One of life's little pleasures is sharing memories of days gone by with my son. I really enjoy telling him of the antics I pulled in school. In my elementary school career I received countless spankings, stood in the corner, sat in a chair while wearing a dunce cap, and put my nose in a circle on a chalk board. One of the pranks I pulled on many occasions was placing a tack in the chair of an unwary victim. It was fun watching their suprised expression and the dance performed following the painful stick from the tack's sharp point.
Apparently Ozzy overheard me laughing after sharing one of my exploits, so he decided it was his turn to pull one on his daddy. There was one particular afternoon spent working on a project at home. At one point I got up out of my chair for some reason, and while I was out of the room Ozzy went to work. I returned to my seat, plopped myself down, and was immediately jarred by an unimaginable pain in my backside. I jumped up, screaming in pain and dancing a jig that would have been the envy of the most seasoned perfomer. Meanwhile Ozzy is rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably. When the dust settled I began pulling several sharp tacks out of my pants. I could understand one tack, but ten?... it was over the top.
I must admit Ozzy got me that time. Little does he know that payback will be a real pleasure. It will be swift, it will be righteous, and it will be without mercy!
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